Friday, January 9, 2015

6 Disorganized Thoughts From an Aging Momma

I have so many thoughts floating around in my head right now. I've wanted to blog on several topics, but I haven't been able to organize my thoughts enough to write them out and make sense of them all.

There's the topic of serving in Guatemala where there are literally thousands of missionaries and NGO's, but is there really any grand good coming from it? Is Guatemala any better off now than it was 40 or even 20 years ago? Don't take this wrong or in a negative light...remember these are unorganized floating thoughts. I don't need actual answers...yet.

There's marriage issues. Sometimes I wonder. Just wonder. How do so many marriages survive? No really. We are all sinners. There will always be issues. Always. I stick by my marriage advice to all. Either make date nights happen, or don't expect to last juntos a lifetime. Also, marriage on the mission field, I'm pretty sure quadruples your separation risk. But. It also strengthens your bond tenfold. I know, seems contradictory. But again. These are my random unorganized thoughts.

There's homeschooling my high schooler issues. We are studying early church history in 10th grade at the moment. I've come to the conclusion that the church was so messed up as soon as the disciples left Rome that no wonder the present day church is a mess. So I blame them. Well, not really. Just seems like any easy scapegoat. But I must say, there's nothing new under the sun. Look at America and then Rome 2000 years ago. Hmmm....

So then there's aging. I have been struggling with my hearing. So I've concluded it's either aging or I had a stroke. It's effected my Spanish to the point that I sometimes feel like I never really learned the language, just a figment of my imagination. But I'm too embarrassed to ask the people to repeat their questions. My kids complain about my disability daily. "I've been calling you for like 10 minutes, Mom!" Of course, in that case, it could possibly be considered selective hearing. Shhh!!

There's also the oldest-child-left-the-nest-early-saga without finishing high school. Which would never be an issue, except that the three 10th graders are all well aware of this little known fact. So when I say, you need to know such and such for college and they all three throw back...I'm not going to college, so you can skip that. So I continue...you need this to graduate from high school. Well, did Mickey have to know that? Because he never finished and look at him. So, well, guess what? This is important stuff. You just need to know it. And the challenging conversation continues routing me down a path that leads to a dead end. Thus more very unorganized complex thoughts swirling around in my head.

Then there's the whole disillusioned topic of Facebook. We are still members who are daily attached. We...who rely on communicating with the outside world via FB. When I first joined, it was all personal status updates and lots of pictures of people's kids that I would otherwise never get to watch grow up. Now it's (spoken with the dramatic voice of my spouse), "You will not believe what happened to this dog! You have to watch this!" Or "I never cry, but after I watched this, I bawled my eyes out." Or "This was so sweet. Watch it and it will bring you to tears!" You get the point. There will always be issues with social media, just for that very reason. It's social.

There's probably other random thoughts I've had lately as well, but because of my stroke/old age they're lost in the swirl. So for now, they'll stay swirling until one of these days when I have a chance to rest my over-crowded brain. I was reminded today by a friend that what I was considering rest (two months home to the States, time off school with guests, a couple of multi-family trips to the beach) was in fact not rest at all. Makes sense when you think about it. 

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